Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
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I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
You are a genius and a whore.
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