she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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