do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
Randomize
