His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
I see more hoeing in ur future
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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