so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Randomize
