Sry I called you an 8
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
it glows. i had to have it.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
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