I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Randomize