he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
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