I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize