tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
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