oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
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