I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
