How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
19 Cringe-worthy Bachelorette Party Texts
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
The 23 Worst Things That Have Happened After a One Night Stand
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends