Buhtt sex?
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I used to practice getting hit by cars.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Randomize