haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Randomize
