Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
