oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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