hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
time to smoke my breakfast
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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