My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
Randomize
