is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
