What a fucking waste of an outfit
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
