Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
So gin and wine won't be happening again
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
