Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
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