whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize