dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
