Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize