Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
