Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
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