i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Who wears a wallet chain?!
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
She even gives head with a lisp.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
