While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
