I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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