I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
