im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
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