First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize