That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
