I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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