Texts From Last Night

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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.

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  (770): Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable. http://tfl.nu/w2xg
  Replies (16) Good night (2724) Bad night (1323)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?

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  (402): how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship? http://tfl.nu/xa9a
  Replies (44) Good night (8600) Bad night (777)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team

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  (360): Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team http://tfl.nu/lnn4
  Replies (6) Good night (4442) Bad night (1266)
• Favorite

  (772): View more from Florida

  You took a bar mat shot.

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  (772): You took a bar mat shot. http://tfl.nu/02d5
  Replies (11) Good night (850) Bad night (2733)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.

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  (203): I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest. http://tfl.nu/16wx
  Replies (2) Good night (922) Bad night (1394)
• Favorite

  (907): View more from Alaska

  I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.

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  (907): I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled. http://tfl.nu/g1t3
  Replies (11) Good night (2216) Bad night (871)
• Favorite

  (661): View more from California

  He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!

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  (661): He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth! http://tfl.nu/q4tp
  Replies (23) Good night (2556) Bad night (1341)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today

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  (+61): I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today http://tfl.nu/nnzy
  Replies (3) Good night (1990) Bad night (796)
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.

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  (740): I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of. http://tfl.nu/s19w
  Replies (8) Good night (1404) Bad night (669)
• Favorite

  (480): View more from Arizona

  So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?

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  (480): So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast? http://tfl.nu/qa47
  Replies (3) Good night (1089) Bad night (621)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom

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  (919): Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom http://tfl.nu/af7u
  Replies (5) Good night (1648) Bad night (440)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.

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  (405): Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want. http://tfl.nu/hc2w
  Replies (1) Good night (609) Bad night (282)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.

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  (561): Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking. http://tfl.nu/ixjm
  Replies (4) Good night (288) Bad night (561)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.

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  (310): You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice. http://tfl.nu/o1c5
  Replies (0) Good night (366) Bad night (478)
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night

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  (323): We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night http://tfl.nu/njny
  Replies (0) Good night (277) Bad night (387)

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