I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
