PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
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