your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up