If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW