I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in