Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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