it wasn't lemon gatorade
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Randomize
