omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
where are my pants?
in the oven.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize