I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
