im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
