Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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