this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
accomplished twins. life is a go
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Randomize