Your tits are I can't wait for
your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
I cockslap morals
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Randomize