T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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