I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
