I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
