HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
